For Chris.
ROB FORD *FART NOISE* SADTROMBONE.COM
This is a phone conversation with CBC Radio’s Stuart Mclean, edited down to just Stuart’s fake stutters.
I don’t know if there’s a point to this. It’s not good to say “uh…” on the radio, so sometimes y- y- you gotta s- stutter. Plus it- it… well, it makes your… speech sound more sentimental and… and heartfelt.
(via garethsimpson)
Source: elevators
Source: garethsimpsonFrom the “Only in Canada” department: something that is neither English nor French gets printed in both English and French.
- ‘Canada’s largest city,’ couched in terms that imply the Rest of Canada is utterly dependent on and revolves around Toronto, “the locus of Canadian X,” “the centre of X,” etc.
- ‘HAVE WE TOLD YOU ABOUT MULTICULTURALISM?’
- ‘Let us compare ourselves to New York at almost comical length,’ though the Greater Toronto Area is three and a half times as small and roughly half the size of Chicago
- Unironically, ‘Canada is full of elites! Just look at all those elites!’
- ‘We elected an incompetent mayor and his insane older brother! Woe is us! Why aren’t you pitying us for the officials we democratically elected?’
- ‘BUT SERIOUSLY, DID WE TELL YOU ABOUT OUR MANY DIVERSE COMMUNITIES? LET US REPEAT OURSELVES, JUST SO YOU HEARD.’
- COLD
- ‘despite popular belief, it is a place that exists’
- SO COLD
- ‘heart of the continent,’ ‘geographical centre of North America,’ ‘incredible geographic isolation’
- SO VERY COLD
- violent crime, ‘murder capital of Canada’
- I-I CAN’T FEEL MY LEGS ANYMORE
- slurpees
- CHRIST ON A CRACKER WHY WOULD YOU EVEN BUILD A CITY HERE
- Winnipeg Jets
- DON’T YOU SEE THIS IS GOD’S WAY OF TRYING TO KILL YOU
Canadian Content!
(from a post by the inimitable Jaime Weinman)